Is it sad that I want someone to care?

Hola Papi,

I am enjoying myself a lot actually, although I started the day very emotionally. I woke up at 7:42 (which really means getting out of bed at 8:30), then went to school to pick up my work permit. Then, while, I was on the bus to get to Karen's house, there was this adorable little girl and his dad, and it made me miss you so much. So... I called your number (even though I know you wouldn't pick up... I do that a lot, hoping to hear your voice but being disappointed because I end up just hearing some operator saying your number) and left you a message. Just missing you... then after visiting Karen I went to Japantown to drop off my work permit. I need to call my boss tomorrow... Anyways, then I went to the Theatre. Before going inside though, a friend (Sia) and I went to this cute little cafe. I got an alfajor, then watched the World Cup... I felt like I should be there with you. It was so much.

I think summer is just going to be generally sad. Blegh... anyways, the alfajor and futbol-watching was difficult so (me being the idiotically sensitive emotionall unstable dumb girl I am) I started sobbing. couldn't stop.

Man, I know you're trying to find yourself over in Argentina, and I guess I'm forced to do that here. But I don't know if I can. Maybe I'll never find who I am until I visit Argentina again.
Despite what you think, we have the same home. Maybe not the same house, but definitely the same home.
Remember what George Carlin said? A home is a figurative idea where one can find comfort and love, whereas a house is a place to put all of your stuff.
Obviously (and especially because its just Madeleine who never speaks to me) I can't find any love here.

I know when you said "Tell me, you can trust me" you didn't expect yet another hopeless email from your stupidly emotion-filled daughter.

I'm sorry... sometimes I feel so stubborn for telling you all of this, when I know I'm not the only one feeling this way. Everyone always tells me that I should be okay by now... so why aren't I?
Why am I feeling even worse? Why do I have all of these feelings?
Why I can't I just be sad for a little bit... is this how all summers are going to be?

Am I just being really pathetic?
What's WRONG with me?
Papi, te necesito. Mami no me ayuda. Nadie puede ayudarme... solo soy una chica triste. No lo puedo cambiar.

I love you Papi... it's so painful.

Mimi